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Welcome to Wiretaps
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 Sydney: We were ambushed. But we fought back. We survived. (she laughs)
Will: Yeah, my parents and I sort of went through the same thing.
Francie: Okay, listen. Every time I walk into the room lately, you guys hush up as if I'm interrupting something. I mean, am I?
Will: What? No.
Irina: I was a fool to think any ideology could come before my daughter.
Sydney: And I like it.
Vaughn: What?
Sydney: Your new suit.
Vaughn: Oh. It's not new. I just... don't wear it that often. I came from a funeral. Alice's father died.
Marshall: Course, I never actually left Southern California, but every once in a while I like to show my mom all the places I've never really been to.
Sark: You know it's a pity we're traveling separately. We could have used the opportunity to get to know each other better.
Sydney (sarcastically): Yeah, I'm really broken up about that too.
Irina: By "previous dealings" you mean our marriage? You know, technically, we may still be husband and wife.
Vaughn: Well, you're cleared to read classified documents and you get a government salary. Which isn't much.
Will: Compared to what I make now it's ... much.
Sydney: I know. I hate it, too. But after Danny and what happened to you, I've accepted the fact that it's as a gesture of love to deceive the people I care about.
Sydney: My math skills may be above average but I can't do advanced calculus in my head.
Sloane: That's why you're going in with Marshall.
Marshall: Marshall who?
Marshall (to Sydney): You don't have to thank me, it's my job to keep you safe.
Marshall: What I always say, "If it ain't Baroque, don't fix it."
Marshall: Thank God for the British and their anti-gun laws right?!
Sydney: What were you saying to those guards?
Marshall: Uh, uh, 'I can smell you from here' in Ewok.
Sydney: Ewok?
Marshall: The official language of the indigenous creatures of the planet Endor...I think I peed myself a little. I mean, not a lot, just a little squirt.
Sydney: Marshall, focus!
Marshall (dazed): I love you. (Sydney slaps him)
Marshall: Hey, you know the best part? I've never been prouder to be one of the good guys.
Irina: Jack. Thus far, I've agreed to be debriefed only by Sydney. From now on, I'm willing to talk to you, too.
Marshall (on the phone): Mom, of course they fed me on the plane. It was some sort of chicken or...squid.
Ariana: His answers are too perfect. I mean, he even gets angry when it makes strategic sense.
Back to Wiretaps Season 2
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